Tag Archives: Superficial

Equalise Imbalance

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It’s typical how some only seem to know you when they want something from you and how obsessively persistent they can be for as long as it takes to get it. The moment it’s provided it becomes silent again and no serious efforts are made to equalise the imbalance caused by their actions. I’ve tried to equalise -although I didn’t have to- and I can’t be bothered anymore.

A friend said to me: ‘you shouldn’t try to carry the burden of others’ misdeeds, rudeness, insensitivity’ and he is right, as usual. I really shouldn’t. I seem to have different standards than some (read: non-superficial) when it comes to courtesy and principles. Instead of wasting it on vultures who don’t appreciate values I should share it with those who do…

Others told me to be open, await a result or try again, but I feel I tried enough. If it is such hard work -while it shouldn’t be- than I don’t see the point trying to hang on to something that obviously to me has a different meaning than to the other party. The expectations of life depend upon diligence; the mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.

So I’m gonna sharpen my tools, take my wise friend’s advice and focus on ‘me’. I’m blessed to have someone who shares the same principles, who inspires me and shows me different perspectives when I need to be reminded of how to put myself first…

Speaking of which… I have to get ready for a trip to the Lowlands and a forthcoming interview. I need to pack and I have absolutely no idea what to wear since it’s like 10 degrees warmer in Amsterdam than it is here…

Equalise imbalance…

The Ice Queen

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Why is it that some devious mothers find pleasure in mentally castrating their sons when they’re still boys, so it leaves them unable to acknowledge and recognise the difference between manipulation and unconditional acceptance later in life as adults? Why is it that these women choose their own ego over the wellbeing of their child and scar them for life instead?

The victims -of course- don’t realise most of the time that they’ve become a copy of the manipulative and destructive ways of what was supposed to be a good role model mum. She created a man with the -still attached- umbilical cord wrapped around his throat, ready to slowly suffocate him whenever she isn’t pleased with him…

She never needed words to show her disapproval of the other girls and women in her son’s life. She taught him instantly while he was still a baby; she would turn into the ice queen whenever he did something ‘wrong’. Her cold-hearted behaviour rubbed off well and over time all it would take was silence or a certain look to cause the guilt.

She created the perfect ‘Pavlov’s dog’ by changing a unique human being into nothing but a conditioned reflex, a mirror image of herself: unable to love, unable to feel, unable to commit, unable to be his true nature. He’s just a sad reflex consumed by extremes, money, lust, career and superficial and conditional behaviour towards those around him.

If he’s lucky, the boy will learn what is real one day, the moment the adult in him opens up to someone who represents the exact opposite of his superficial hag of a mum. Perhaps he’ll start to heal and learn to accept the new and unconditional, and steer clear of the unhealthy relationship and the damage it’s causing, it will be the finale of the worship.

Perhaps he will finally cut the cord and see through the evil deceiving scheme. She no longer will be able to provoke the guilt-ridden boy in him and he’ll be free from the chains, free to learn what real qualities are in life. And he’ll realise and learn that no amount of money will be able to compensate for what he’ll experience next and how disconnected he was from his true nature.