Monthly Archives: June 2009

Jekyll and Hyde

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This is written during a brief hiatus from blogging, when I had no internet connection for three weeks

Nothing is ever good enough for you

No matter how hard one tries there will be complaints

Like you’re Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

Sparse moments you’re considerate and sweet

More often you’re cold and extremely negative

About anything and anyone

I wonder how you became so utterly bitter

That you can’t even find humour in my jokes

That everything I say in a light way

Is taken as heavy as possible

Even my kind words are seen as criticism

And your answers are hurtful attacks

You say I’m welcome but in the same sentence

You criticise my friends and life, my existence

I try to keep track of the times

you said something nice about anything or anyone

But I can still count them on one hand

Negativism and relentlessness are your middle name

You’re a human being with flaws

I’ve tried to accept you the way you are

Because I’ve known for years things won’t change

But where the child has hope, the adult has given up

Three years at a distance did make a difference

I’m left with compassion and a vast set of boundaries

Dr. Jekyll has a friendly soft personality but

unfortunately Mr. Hyde mastered his own skills…

Stranger To Myself

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This is written during a brief hiatus from blogging, when I had no internet connection for three weeks

I’m back to where I originally started and it feels strange, it’s like I’m having another culture shock again. I have to explore ways that are not familiar with me because I’ve been away for a while. Last Tuesday I went downtown to register at the city hall. I’d forgotten what it looked like and I was amazed by the marble floors and pillars, the canals and terraces surrounding this beautiful old building.

I was warned about having to wait for some time but I feel they didn’t keep me waiting that long at all. I guess ‘long’ means ‘hours’ to me but this only took 20 minutes. The woman opposite of me was very friendly and she answered all my questions, even the odd ones. I had to take the bus there but it was a nice trip, a trip down memory lane. So much has changed ever since I moved, so many new buildings and shops.

This place used to be my home once but I realise it isn’t anymore. I’m reliving memory after memory which is funny in a way but scary at the same time. I recognise parts, for some odd reason they’re mostly statues which I used to climb and parks where I used to play. I saw the fences I used to sit on and hang from that have been there ever since I was a child. And next to it the building where we had gymnastics.

I cycled yesterday, after a long period of having the bicycle in storage I could finally cycle again. The weather was amazing and I cycled passed all the things that brought back these childhood memories.