It’s typical how some only seem to know you when they want something from you and how obsessively persistent they can be for as long as it takes to get it. The moment it’s provided it becomes silent again and no serious efforts are made to equalise the imbalance caused by their actions. I’ve tried to equalise -although I didn’t have to- and I can’t be bothered anymore.
A friend said to me: ‘you shouldn’t try to carry the burden of others’ misdeeds, rudeness, insensitivity’ and he is right, as usual. I really shouldn’t. I seem to have different standards than some (read: non-superficial) when it comes to courtesy and principles. Instead of wasting it on vultures who don’t appreciate values I should share it with those who do…
Others told me to be open, await a result or try again, but I feel I tried enough. If it is such hard work -while it shouldn’t be- than I don’t see the point trying to hang on to something that obviously to me has a different meaning than to the other party. The expectations of life depend upon diligence; the mechanic that would perfect his work must first sharpen his tools.
So I’m gonna sharpen my tools, take my wise friend’s advice and focus on ‘me’. I’m blessed to have someone who shares the same principles, who inspires me and shows me different perspectives when I need to be reminded of how to put myself first…
Speaking of which… I have to get ready for a trip to the Lowlands and a forthcoming interview. I need to pack and I have absolutely no idea what to wear since it’s like 10 degrees warmer in Amsterdam than it is here…
Equalise imbalance…
