It’s kind of sad when someone becomes so resentful and bitter that it will reflect badly on their future and its posibilities. I could see them end like that. I should’ve known better since I grew up with a person with an attitude like this and now I see another -actually three- become the exact same copy of emotionally draining negativism.
Tho it’s certainly not my responsibility, I do feel sorry for them, for not being able to take the good part from an experience, contemplate the whole, and move on without grudges. Over the years I’ve become tired of, and immune to hearing the constant whinging. Funnily enough, the one person I’d already given up on, drastically changed.
It’s because I’d changed my attitude towards her and showed her the consequences of verbally attacking someone. I would tell her exactly what I would do: because I refuse to listen to the constant nagging, she should either stop or I would walk out of the room. I didn’t realise that I was actually dealing with a three year old at the time.
But treating her like a three year old has paid off, she is now showing respect. At times the drama starts again -especially over the phone- but then I don’t say anything and now she knows that once I don’t react it’s no point to continue and she will change subject. It’s almost like I’ve been reprogramming a mind to enable it to think positive.
I’m happy it worked out like this because the bond has become much stronger since. I guess the negative attitude must have rubbed off on others though, either that or it is a gene pool issue and passed on in families. I’ve chosen to let go of a close family member because she became the copy. Calling her, only brought me frustration.
Last time I’ve spoken with her she’d become so self-absorbed, it confirmed my decision made months earlier, not to contact her again. I guess people are shocked because I’ve not set my boundaries with them before. So when I tell them I don’t wish to continue an off-ballance relationship, they become angry with me for telling my truth…
There’s a point in your life when you get tired of trying to fix everything and trying to make everyone happy. When you finally decide to quit, it’s not giving up. It’s realising you don’t need certain people, the blah-blah and the unacceptable behavior they bring to your life.