Monthly Archives: May 2013

Let Go…

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I wish we could’ve remained friends but that’s impossible coz I can tell there is still hurt, it is shown to me in different ways. I guess I’ve been misunderstood when I decided to move on and let go. Some things happened that I will not be able to forget. If you need someone, you expect someone to be there for you. I’ve learnt over the years, to turn into survival mode when your expectations are not met.

I’d give up hope and I’ll stop putting myself in a position where I depend on someone to be empathetic, understanding and/or supportive. I will show the world that I can take care of things myself and not stray from the path I’ve chosen to take. But once there, there is no easy turning back. I will not be able to trust again that easily. I’ve learnt over the years to fight my own battles with or without help.

In this case (and many others)… without…

I wasn’t willing to listen, just tired of fights and having to answer to everyone around me whilst they only felt the need to judge. I was tired of them telling me what to say, what to wear, what to eat, how to behave, what to feel. Tired being told what was best for me and all the so-called ‘good’ advice. So I took a course and learnt how to set my boundaries and how not to be used as a doormat.

I learnt how to be good to myself and nurture the needs that I have. It is still the hardest thing for me to do but I’m slowly getting there. But once there’s personal growth there’s also a possibility that you’ll outgrow others. I had to say goodbye to some because it became clear to me why they were still in my life and it wasn’t for the right reasons. I had to let go of them, I owed it to myself.

I failed tho, to make this one person understand my reasons why I had to do what needed to be done. If someone is not willing to let go and tries to hold on to something that is no longer there, there is no other option left than to cut the ties. It’s not what I wanted but how I was forced to in a way. This person is still not dealing with the facts, I can see pain, anger, frustration or worse: sarcasm.

It hurts if you know that you can’t do anything about it because they’re not willing to accept the truth or listen to what you have to say. So if you know you’re the cause of this, it might be a good decision to create distance and not get involved at all. It doesn’t make things easier tho. It’s something that needed to be done, I’m not proud of it but I hope that one day, my decision will be understood…

Out with The Old in with The New

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My ‘friend’… I don’t mind seeing you go since it seems you are in denial of my happiness, my life, my job and everything that defines me. When I sense envy instead and reluctance to nurture the relationship, than I guess you were right to be so quick to ‘unfriend’ and ‘block’ me on Facebook, for pointing this out to you. I guess the truth hits hard a times… :roll:

You barely respond to my emails not to mention react on the things that -you know- are important to me. You refuse to reply to my comments left for you on FB and instead turn this into a one-way street where all you do is absorb the attention you get from others. Life is not just about you. Perhaps that is a tough thing for you to grasp but it ain’t. Wake up call!

It’s sad that it has to be like this after such a long time, but I guess I haven’t been happy with the friendship nor with you and your reactions for a while now, but each time you’ve managed to brush it off. If you don’t want to be an active part of the communication process, it’s time for me to leave the relationship behind and gladly move on.

Yes I feel sorry for you that a certain issue in your life is happening and that you are scared of what the future will bring for you and your children. But it doesn’t mean that the world revolves around you and you only. Every person on this planet has got his or her own problems. You either deal with it or you don’t but don’t expect the ostrich attitude from me.

If you want others to be there for you when you need them, it might be wise to at least show some interest and care in case the day will come where you need them. I guess the fact that you immediately ‘unfriended’ and blocked me -after I told you my truth and how I felt about the situation-, says it all really. It was the kind of confirmation I was expecting.

It made me chuckle… As did your question about where my blog had gone? (..) It has been here since about ‘forever’… If you would’ve been interested in my life thus this blog, you would’ve known. So yes, that question seriously raised my eyebrow. I no longer feel comfortable being myself or sharing parts of my life with you, so it’s time to move on.

I have revalued my expectations and this friendship and I’m thru, I’m not your doormat whenever it suits you nor will I be your Facebook self-esteem booster whilst you play your well performed attention-seeker role. I’m actually quite happy with the way you left things; fact is that my personal growth has completely outgrown you and this friendship.

Thanks for making that perfectly clear, I can let go of something I’ve tried to hold on to for way way too long! It now can be replaced by something bigger and more beautiful :)

I do not open up the truth to one who is not eager to get knowledge, nor help out any one who is not anxious to explain himself. When I have presented one corner of a subject to any one, and he cannot from it learn the other three, I do not repeat my lesson.